Beginning the Journey

As an adult survivor of childhood abuse, I have spent many years working to repair the damage that was done to me.  I have received professional assistance, and I have created a chosen family that is loving and supportive.  Through this work and with the help of my support system, I have made drastic improvements in my mental (and physical) health and the way I see the world, including myself.

I’ve been missing a spiritual element to my recovery process.  While I’ve tried a few churches, I haven’t found a place that seems to fulfill whatever it is I am lacking spiritually.  I am drawn to tarot as a way to get in touch with both my subconscious and the universe / collective unconscious.

I’ve chosen to call myself the “The Tarot Donkey” in part because donkey can be used colloquially to mean fool, and this reminds me of the tarot’s fool’s journey.  Additionally, donkeys are viewed as stubborn, but when they refuse to move they are sensing danger and assessing the situation.  While awareness of one’s surroundings and cautious approach to potential danger are generally positive assets, I also think it is important that I don’t find myself frozen when there is no real danger present. Through learning and practicing tarot, I hope to gain deeper insights about myself and the world around me which will allow me to move more freely.

I tend to get a bit obsessive about things when I become excited about them, so I’ve ordered a few books and decks to begin my study.  My books have all arrived, but I’m still (admittedly impatiently) waiting on my decks to arrive.  The books I’ve chosen to begin my study with are:

  • Holistic Tarot: An Integrative Approach to Using Tarot for Personal Growth by Benebell Wen — and here’s her website
  • Tarot: Plain and Simple by Anthony Louis
  • Tarot For Life: Reading the Cards for Everyday Guidance and Growth by Paul Quinn


I’ve skimmed each of them and have decided to start with Benebell Wen’s book since it grabbed my attention the most.  I very much like her approach to what she calls “tarot analytics.”  This approach is exactly what I had in mind when I decided I’d like to learn tarot as a healing tool.  I can often get caught up in my head, and I hope through tarot to be able to get a different frame of reference or a reminder of what I’m leaving out when I’m struggling in a particular situation.  I also recently stumbled across a neat post of her’s here, which I’m linking to so I can find it again later. 🙂

I’ve also enjoyed watching Tarot Living’s videos. I enjoy the way she explains things, so I’m pretty excited about her current 8 part tarot lesson that is in progress right now.

Many sources have recommended keeping a tarot journal, so I will be using this blog as my journal.  As I move through card meanings, I will begin to create a glossary where I can easily access those particular posts.

I’m incredibly eager for my cards to arrive so I can begin to get to know the decks. I am interested in not only learning / discovering the card meanings, but in seeing how the same card from deck to deck may say something a little different.

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